TITLE: I Love Lucy โ The Purdyโs Chocolate Caper
Starring:
- Miley Cyrus as Lucy
- Luis Morgado as Ricky Ricardo
- Nelly Furtado as Ethel Mermen
- Joe Jukic as Fred Mertz
SETTING:
Purdyโs Chocolate Factory, East Vancouver โ purple boxes, conveyor belts buzzing, workers in hairnets, the sweet smell of melted chocolate everywhere. A modern reboot with classic slapstick energy, filmed in warm technicolor tones to echo the 1950s but with modern Vancouver references.
COLD OPEN
INT. RICKY & LUCYโS LIVING ROOM โ MORNING
Ricky (Luis Morgado) is dressed in a vintage-inspired purple Purdyโs uniform.
Lucy (Miley) lounges on the couch, eating a Purdyโs Sweet Georgia Brown out of the box.
RICKY
Lucy, I need you to promiseโpromiseโyou wonโt show up at the factory today. Weโre behind schedule on the holiday rush.
LUCY
Ricky, honey, would I ever do something like that?
She smiles like a guilty cat.
RICKY
Sรญ. Every time.
Cut to Lucyโs innocent grin.
ACT 1: THE PLAN
INT. PURDYโS FACTORY โ BREAK ROOM
Ricky gives a pep talk to the workers.
Ethel (Nelly Furtado), now the sassy union coordinator, sips coffee.
Fred (Joe Jukic), wearing suspenders and a Purdyโs hairnet, reads the Vancouver Sun.
RICKY
Okay, team, Christmas season means no mistakes! No more missing chocolates, no more mystery dents in our Sweet Georgia Browns!
FRED
(glances at Ethel)
Yeah, last time someone dented โem by sitting on a whole tray.
ETHEL
I told you, Fred, I was tired! Those boxes are comfortable.
Ricky shakes his head.
Thenโ
Lucy tiptoes in wearing oversized sunglasses and a purple trench coat.
ETHEL
Lucyโฆ what in the name of Laura Secord are you doing here?
LUCY
Girlsโฆ I got a job here.
(pauses dramatically)
Iโm gonna surprise Ricky!
The audience laughs.
ACT 2: THE CONVEYOR BELT SCENE โ Purdyโs Edition
INT. PURDYโS CONVEYOR BELT ROOM
Lucy and Ethel are assigned to the Cherry Cordial Line โ endless glossy maraschino cherries are dipped in chocolate, placed on a belt, and whisked toward packaging.
A foreman explains the job, strict as a drill sergeant:
FOREMAN
These are premium Purdyโs chocolates. If even one gets messed up, Iโll know. Understand?
Lucy and Ethel nod innocently.
FOREMAN
Good.
(turns)
Speed it up!
The belt lurches forward.
Cue Chaos.
- Lucy tries dipping cherries but drops entire handfuls into the chocolate vat.
- Ethel tries to help, slips, and accidentally turns the belt faster.
- Chocolates begin piling up like a sugary avalanche.
Lucy panics.
LUCY
Ethel! Theyโre coming at me like theyโre mad at me!
She starts stuffing chocolates:
โ into her pockets
โ down her shirt
โ into her hat
โ in her mouth (several at once)
Ethel tries to box them but ends up boxing her own hands inside a package.
The foreman returns suddenly.
Lucy freezes, cheeks bulging with chocolates like a guilty chipmunk.
FOREMAN
Everything going smoothly?
Lucy tries to answer but only a muffled chocolate gargle comes out.
ACT 3: THE PURDYโS FUDGE DISASTER
Lucy gets reassigned to the fudge-pouring machine.
Ethel whispers:
ETHEL
Just pull the lever gently.
Lucy yanks it like sheโs starting a lawn mower.
A tidal wave of molten Purdyโs fudge pours out.
Fred and Ricky walk in just in time to slip, slide, and fall into the mess like itโs a chocolate skating rink.
RICKY
(in Spanish)
ยกLucy, tengo suficiente!
LUCY
(slipping and landing on him)
Rickyโฆ I think I pulled the wrong lever.
FRED
No kidding, Lucy! Iโm drowning in caramel like a human Sweet Georgia Brown!
ACT 4: THE CLEAN-UP & THE CONFESSION
INT. PURDYโS BREAK ROOM โ AFTERMATH
Lucy sits beside Ricky, both covered head to toe in chocolate.
Ethel and Fred stand sheepishly.
LUCY
Rickyโฆ I just wanted to help. And maybeโฆ get some free chocolates.
RICKY
Lucy, you donโt need to sneak into my job to help.
(smiling)
You could just ask.
Lucy melts (emotionally, not literally).
LUCY
Really?
RICKY
Sure.
But next timeโ
(taps her nose)
โnot near heavy machinery.
Ethel laughs.
ETHEL
Come on, Lucy, letโs get cleaned up before Fred starts licking the floor again.
FRED
Hey! I only did that once. And it was expensive chocolate.
TAG SCENE
INT. RICKY & LUCYโS HOME โ NIGHT
Lucy sneaks a Purdyโs box from behind her back.
LUCY
Rickyโฆ I brought dessert.
RICKY
Lucyโฆ that better not be from the factory.
Lucy freezes.
Audience laughs.
Fade out.
END CREDITS IN CLASSIC I LOVE LUCY HEART-SHAPED FRAME
